I am sure the whole town of Sabetha already knows but I don't want all 620 friends (a number that is slowly but surely going to get to 300) on Facebook to know all of my business. Anyway. November 19th (3 days after my 20th birthday) I found out I was pregnant. I went to the doctor for the first time on Friday, December 2nd and my doctor told me that my due date is July 17th and we'll have our first ultrasound on January 3rd. As of the 2nd, I am seven weeks along. The daddy situation is complicated and I might tackle that in a different post someday.
It was a huge surprise and of course, with me being in school and not having a full time job and especially not being married, was not planned. I've only known for two weeks but oh, how my life plans have changed so much. I have one class to take until I am completely done at Highland so I'm moving home at semester (I'll be taking the aforementioned class online) and working. Baby will get here in July so I'll work and work and work so I have a little nest egg built up and then when Baby arrives I'll take some time off but go back to working until I think it’s time to return to school.
This last semester, I feel like I have really gotten myself together. I've been on top of my school work like no one's business. My things in my room (although not perfect) are much more organized and I'm starting to see my mother in me a little when I get real upset about things not being in their place. (I'm only that way 70% of the time so I don't want anyone thinking I'm anywhere close to the organization queen that my mom is.) I'll be on the honor roll this semester at Highland, which I believe is a first for me..at least since my days at Sabetha Middle School. In high school I could've cared less about my school work. As long as I passed, I was happy. And I passed. I graduated on time, but not with the GPA I could've had. But the past is the past. This semester I finally found my motivation (it had been missing since birth).
Also this semester I decided I wanted to go to KU and participate in their Textile Design and Weaving program. I love fabric and I love artsy things so what better thing for me to do?! I thought it was absolutely perfect for me. But for now, it will have to wait a year... or a year and a half.
Baby and I will live with my parents until I am financially stable enough to handle things on my own... and I'm assuming with my financial situation right now ($4.86 in my checking account), I'll be there awhile. Until I go back to school anyway.
I am so happy and thankful for my supportive, loving, caring, reassuring, comforting, WONDERFUL family. I don't have any idea what I would ever do without them. Yes this baby was a huge surprise and not planned but I never want he/she to think that they are a mistake. Things happen for a reason and I know I will love this baby just as much as I would if it were planned. Hopefully I covered all of my bases here. I have a plan and I have a great family that will help me get through. I can't think of too much more that I need.
Enough with all the boring informative stuff. Here's some tidbits from the last two months--
1.) I drove 16 miles at 11 pm to get radishes and Lowry's seasoning salt.
2.) And then the next night I did it again to get pumpkin seeds.
3.) "Morning" sickness is a lie. It actually lasts all day long.
4.) I think my dad will be a darn cute Papa and my mom a cute Nana (or whatever her grandma name will be)..it helps that my parents are the best.. that means they'll be DOUBLE the best when they're grandparents!! Right? :)
5.) Baby is approximately the size of a blueberry and still has a tail. I occasionally refer to it as Blueberry or Tadpole.
So, after the shock and worried-ness all wears off, we can get excited right? I mean this is a BABY!! Yes, sleepless nights. Yes, diapers. Yes, crying. Yes, no money. Yes, my life revolves around someone else now (a much cuter, sweeter, softer, snuggly-er someone else). Yes, I don't know all the hardships of motherhood. But I've always wanted a family. This isn't the situation and timing I would've chosen for myself but what's done is done and there's no turning back now. So, yes, little hands. Yes, a snuggle bug. Yes, baby clothes. Yes, a little baby nose. And yes, little baby smiles.
So, thank you to everyone who has reached out to me and given me love and support. I couldn't pick a better support system to have.